What is desire?

An evolutionary impulse.

Desire More


How to be generous.

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Photo credit: Catherine Just

Don’t keep score. If you bring “obligation” into the equation, it makes everything janky. We all do favours (personally, I’m leery of favours) for each other and hope that it will be reciprocated – reciprocity is such a beautiful part of being human…together.

But…really really really it doesn’t matter what you did for anyone yesterday. Really it doesn’t. Don’t let it. You gave it. Let it go. No one owes you anything.

Remembah! (this requires a Yonkers accent): Ya can’t do nuthin’ by yerself. Everyone needs someone to pull it awff. So just give your love freely, with zero resentment. We need each other.

PLAN to give. Plan your giving like you’d plan a vacation every year or a home reno – for real, and with a schedule and a budget. Create a triple bottom line in your business – profits for charity, trees planted for every book sold. At the start of the new year, map out a birthday plan for your beloveds. You don’t need to shop months in advance, this isn’t about being nutty organized. But planning to give has you always listening and looking for how to best give.

Let go of things you think you cherish. A waitress at dinner complimented my friend on her earrings. My very cool friend left the earrings with the tab. I bet that small act rocked the waitress’ world. How much do you really need your stuff? Sometimes we hold onto things for the “principle”. Like say, your bestie loves all things owls but you’re holding on to that owl-embroidered smock that you never wear because your aunt made it. Give it.

Go ahead, be impulsive. For about a year and a half I’ve been saying to Team D, “We’ve really got to up our philanthropic game.” I said it on three different occasions. (Repeat yourself three times and you’re declaring your intentions. Say it a fourth time and you’re droning.) I was about to say it a fourth time to myself and instead, impulsively, I emailed one of my activist heroines that very minute. “Look, I want to help more. How can we help? We gotta help.” Within 48 hours I got Team D involved in what I hope will be the giving campaign of my life. (Stay tuned.)

Be wildly, precisely, obsessively grateful. tweet When you treasure how much you have – from your good health, free evenings, expertise, a loving soul, a bit of cash – you KNOW you have so much to give. If you’re not feeling generous, try harder to feel grateful.

Give what you want(ed) to get. Lots of great charity comes from someone’s early deprivation. Growing up poor, Tony Robbins’ family was gifted Thanksgiving dinner by a stranger one holiday. Now Tony’s International Basket Brigade feeds two million people a year.

Believe in an abundant universe. Life is proliferating life. It’s a scientific fact that there’s more where that came from. More love, more genius, more time, more you.


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Instagram @2x

Last week from Danielle:
Online etiquette, the Golden Rule, and calling bullshit when you need to.

Guess what? Pleasure is power. Volume 2 of the #Truthbomb deck is here!


Photo Credit: Heather Pennell

Guess what? Pleasure is power. Volume 2 of the #Truthbomb deck is here! (And we timed it well with holiday gift giving, don’t you think?) Volume 1 of the deck went big. Volume 2 is just as truthy and juicy.

Gold foil embossing. Luxe creamy stock of a fresh batch of 134 cards. Gorgeous deck box (which is easy breezy to gift wrap.) And because these #Truthbombs are all about soulful questions and heart declarations…it means they work for like, humanity. Or your boss. Or your yoga teacher and hairstylist. And certainly for your best friends. And most DEFINITELY for you.

White & gold goes with everything#Truthbomb cards at place settings and under pillows for out-of-town guests. In a bowl at your doorway for visitors to choose from, tucked in the branches of your Christmas tree, as party favours or gift tags. Make truth the blessing.


Get your Volume 2 deck here.

We’re doing a bundle for the holidays. Done and done. 

  • 5 Decks gets 10% off
  • 10 Decks or more gets 20% off

Love, click, we wrap and mail. 


Online etiquette, the Golden Rule, and calling bullshit when you need to.

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The internet is a democratic space. (For most of us. Not all of us. Hello, China.) So rock your Instagram however you want. Herein, I’m stating how I personally prefer to operate on the interwebs.

Two things. First, the gentle thing: I’d love for all of us to consider the ENERGY of what we’re putting out there – especially where permission/no permission is concerned. Because…it matters.

Secondly and this is where my righteous judgment (and good taste) enters: We all need to be on Asshole Alert when it comes to some of the online liberties that are being over-exercised. If you think, “Hey, all’s fair in the digital world and I’ll do what I want,” well, that’s just not very grown up. That’s just very asshole.  

Considerations for online etiquette and energetics, and calling bullshit when you need to:

The Golden Rule
Refresher: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Jesus says, Thank yooou. He would have been a total gentleman on Facebook.

PERMISSION + kid’s images
If someone posted a picture of me sleeping on to Facebook, I’d be pissed. I’d feel violated. Not good. Is it just me, or for most people is sleep, like, a private thing? ‘cept parents love to post pics of their kids asleep. And being potty trained. And having tantrums. (I wouldn’t want my tantrum and tears posted online either.) Luckily, I have a grown up voice and can make sure that shit doesn’t happen.

I wonder if a child even KNEW that his/her image was being posted (and what that meant in terms of exposure), and knew WHAT was being posted, and had the capacity to express how they FELT about it…I wonder if they’d be all like, “Sure mama, please post pictures of me sleeping and crying and losing my mind.”

Energy. Psyches. Exposure. Tenderness. Worth considering.

PERMISSION + adult strangers’ images
There are times I’m tempted to snap a secret pic of a fashion faux pas to make a point. Last week I really wanted to post this guy’s silly weeny teeny man bun and give a whole decree as to why this trend needs to die immediately. But…would I like to have my lady fun bun captured at the grocery store, or be someone’s ass pic of the day? Even if you didn’t see my face? Nooooooo. Nope I wouldn’t. Golden Rule. No bad pics of me, no bad pics of you. This is playing nice in the universe. Because we’re all sharing the same universe. And fiber optics.

Minor infraction: Posting an image of hard copy communication. For example…I’ve sent people Thank You cards or encouragement notes and they’ve been posted online. I understand that accolades are good for business. But it’s my note to you not the world. If I wanted everyone to see it, I would have taken a picture of it and posted it before I sent it to you that would be called an endorsement, or a grand gesture of affection. But if it’s my note to you, it’s just, you know, my note to you.

Major infraction. Official Asshole Alert: “Professionals” posting someone else’s communication to them WITHOUT THEIR PERMISSION such as a client or customer. But “out of respect” deleting the sender’s name all the while totally dismantling the sender and making a public example out of them.

Of course there are types of disharmonious communication that should be made public it’s part of justice, and whistle blowing, and putting people in their place. I’ve used my own platform more than once to make a point about crap service and unethical behaviour.

But innocuous communication a client query, a customer service interaction where YOU are being looked to for a service of some sort these things are in the container of your business. CONTAINER. As in, meant to be contained. It doesn’t matter if the sender is naive, or nuts, or has entitlement issues. To “call them out” albeit “anonymously” (like that’s really protecting them, like they’re not going to see how you’ve splayed their words on your blog), to call them out is beyond arrogant. It’s actually…unkind.

I’ve been harsh and less than deeply considerate before. I was striving and I was stressed and I decided to pretend that I didn’t know that energy turns into matter. Eventually, hopefully, one starts to choose elegance over ego.

Manners matter. More than clicks and endorsements and being all fucking boss about your positioning.

All communication begins with intention. tweet

Be intentional. Better yet, be intentionally kind. Or just be quiet.Truthbomb_904


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P.S. My much anticipated #Truthbomb Deck Volume 2 drops TOMORROW. Just in time for the holidays. OF COURSE.
Volume 1 of the deck went big. Volume 2 is just as…truthy and juicy. 134 delicious new cards to start your day, bring to parties, desks, and leave behind in cafes.

We’re doing a bundle for the holidays at DANIELLELAPORTE.COM/SHOP

  • Buy 5 Decks and get 10% off
  • Buy 10 Decks or more and get 20% off

#Truthbombs awaaaay!


Last week from Danielle:
Find your tribe. Love them hard. (And, is your tribe a healthy one?)


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