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10 positive consequences of NOT improving yourself

10 consequences of NOT improving yourself

Christopher Starbeam and me post home yoga on my Affirmat.

  1. When you get off of your own case, you tend to ease up on everyone else around you. Which makes you way more fun to be around. Way more. Only good can come of that.
  2. You will probably be more accepting of the way people are. And by “accepting” I don’t mean that you stay in unhealthy relationships with narcissists (insane), or that you hire people purely for their potential (risky), or that you join the committee just to be a good sport (ugh). By “accept” I mean that you stop expending energy trying to change other people, which means that you will have so much more energy for LIVING your life. This calls for an “OMG!” There, I said it. OMG.
  3. You will get to flush at least half of your vitamin supplements because you remember that your body knows.
  4. Think of all that extra time you’ll have with less therapy. Less therapy = more playing, which turns out to be very therapeutic. And you’ll save on parking.
  5. You will do much less explaining and defending of yourself (which is usually crazy making anyway). Who cares what they think?! You are going to:
  6. Dare to under-achieve in the over-pleasing department. tweet
  7. As my friend Terri Cole puts it, you will stop saying yes when you mean no. How cool is THAT?! Very, very cool. Like, unleash your consciousness kind of cool.
  8. Constant self-improvement has numerous associated costs. With all the money you’ll save on workshops on how to have more joy in your life, you could afford a holiday that would be incredibly joyful.
  9. You will have significantly, substantially, epically less guilt – which drives so much self-improvement neuroses. And less guilt means your digestion will improve — and happiness really stems from good digestion. Even monks and motivational speakers know that. And positive consequence #10 of not improving yourself…
  10.   You’ll have time to help others improve their lives. Which might be the best self-improvement methodology, ever.

 

choosing feral

That tired beautiful animal in me needed to die,
but not like a sacrificial offering.
There was nothing forced about it.
Death is necessarily aggressive
to leverage you from one dimension to the next,
but the gods made no demands.
Instead, they waited at the crossing
with garlands and rare oils
to anoint her fur.

She limped to the altar,
an affliction from that time she fell in the trap,
and she said to her creature friends
I’m ready now, but I need you to lift me up

and up and up
they did lift her
into the realm of Spirit Animals and Devas
where she could give her life to
every animal that dared to be
irrevocably feral.


I sounded it out for you. Listen below or click HERE to download to your devices.

New, little big deals. Is this the week you do what you've been scared of?

927073_1493321187563546_1394937838_n My friend Robindra ///link to his IG/// promised he’d show me some DJ ropes (because I wanna spin and mix and stuff when I grow up.) He got a gig in North Van //link: http://finchandbarley.com/ //// and said I could tag along for the night, So I Facebook’d about it, mentioned the locale, said it was a great way to kick off my birthday week, and I put on my black high tops to head out.  Jump cut to an hour into my shadow DJ lesson, skimming playlists and learning about bass lines, when a woman who’d been sitting at the bar the whole time tapped me on the shoulder. She handed me the most incredible bouquet of peonies and a card. “Hi Danielle, Happy Birthday,” she said. "You inspire me. That’s all I came to say really.” I was blown away. It was so random and beautiful. I don’t think anyone else in the place knew me. Just her. Waiting. (Sweet woman, I REALLY hope you’re reading this.)  Brave Peony Lady told me which city she’d driven in from — about an hour away. I had posted location details just a few hours before. “You know,” she said, “I figured it was really time to get out of my comfort zone and just come. So I told my husband I was going and he said, ‘Do it!’ So I did.” We hugged and high five’d. I wanted to cry because well, I cry at everything, but I could feel how big of a deal it was to just get in the car, on a week night, and go somewhere unknown, alone, with a big bouquet of flowers for someone you might not even meet, and to sit at the bar gnoshing on appies until the right moment to say, “I’m me and I came to see you."  I know that moment. Big small incidental feeling monumental kind of moments. Going to my first 5 Rhythms class ///link///, my first tango lesson. Pitching myself to Gayle King at a party, in gold pants. ///link to my post -- search for "gold pants". Asking Deepak Chopra if he ever needed to rest, "...because, dude, you are the hardest working man in the New Age." The first time I rode my bike through a big city - in cwazy twaffic with my new shiny helmet! The first time went to group therapy (first and last time, thank you very much.) Alone. Not knowing. Just wiling enough to get over it being a big deal.  Because there are a lot of times I just... don’t go. You know. I choose no big deal over New Little Big Deal. But it’s the New Little Big deals that bring you alive.  The beautiful irony is that when we step into the unfamiliar, we reclaim ourselves. ///tuhweeetttt!///  Brave Peony Lady inspired me. I don't think she heard me, but I told her that before she made the commute home, in-between a wicked Californication re-mix. I looked at those peonies all week and thought, “Damn, maybe doing that one New Big Little Big Deal sets off a happy chain reaction for her.” And me.

My friend Robindra promised he’d show me some DJ ropes (because I wanna spin and mix and stuff when I grow up). He got a gig in North Van and said I could tag along for the night. So I Facebook’d about it, mentioned the locale, said it was a great way to kick off my birthday week, and I put on my black high tops to head out.

Jump cut to an hour into my shadow DJ lesson, skimming playlists and learning about bass lines, when a woman who’d been sitting at the bar the whole time tapped me on the shoulder. She handed me the most incredible bouquet of peonies and a card. “Hi Danielle, Happy Birthday,” she said. “You inspire me. That’s all I came to say really.” I was blown away. It was so random and beautiful. I don’t think anyone else in the place knew me. Just her. Waiting. (Sweet woman, I REALLY hope you’re reading this.)

Brave Peony Lady told me which city she’d driven in from — about an hour away. I had posted location details just a few hours before. “You know,” she said, “I figured it was really time to get out of my comfort zone and just come. So I told my husband I was going and he said, ‘Do it!’ So I did.” We hugged and high five’d. I wanted to cry because well, I cry at everything, but I could feel how big of a deal it was to just get in the car, on a week night, and go somewhere unknown, alone, with a big bouquet of flowers for someone you might not even meet, and to sit at the bar gnoshing on appies until the right moment to say, “I’m me, and I came to see you.”

I know that moment. Big small incidental feeling monumental kind of moments. Going to my first 5 Rhythms class, my first tango lesson. Pitching myself to Gayle King at a party, in gold pants. Asking Deepak Chopra if he ever needed to rest, “…because, dude, you are the hardest working man in the New Age.” The first time I rode my bike through a big city – in cwazy twaffic with my new shiny helmet! The first time I went to group therapy (first and last time, thank you very much). Alone. Not knowing. Just willing enough to get over it being a big deal.

Because there are a lot of times I just… don’t go. You know. I choose no big deal over New Little Big Deal. But it’s the New Little Big Deals that bring you alive.

The beautiful irony is that when we step into the unfamiliar, we reclaim ourselves. tweet

Brave Peony Lady inspired me. I don’t think she heard me, but I told her just that before she made the commute home, in between a wicked Californication re-mix. I looked at those peonies all week and thought, “Damn, maybe doing that New Little Big Deal set off a happy chain reaction for her.” It did for me.


I sounded it out for you. Listen below or download to your devices HERE.

 

 

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