DESIRE MAP
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What to do after you have a breakthrough. (You’re going to shrink after you expand, so, listen closely.)

Threshold, crossed. You got there. After the grinding, the repetitive strain, the cord-cutting, the screams of release, the bliss of relief — the training paid off. Muscle burn got you across the finish line. Soul fire resurrected you. BREAKTHROUGH.

Rebirth happens. The ascension was real. There’s no turning back now. You are true and you ARE new.

Now what? (Because you’re in a new state. And that’s equally awesome and freaky. And you’re about to slip. Which is rough. And ironically, right on course.)

WHAT TO DO AFTER YOU HAVE A BREAKTHROUGH (in this order, give or take.)

Be so very gentle with yourself. Tenderness is essential. Birth requires recovery time. Athletes rest, they heal their blisters and let the lactic acid run it’s course. Soul seekers, you need to be quieter than usual. Let the change bake into your cells. Don’t shout about your revelations yet. Give yourself a few days to calibrate. Watch a movie. Put some rose oil on your third eye. Drink tea. Eat pasta. Head to the ocean. You know, the comfort stuff.

Notice that you’re noticing more now. A paradigm shift is a new way of seeing, so the grass actually looks greener, and you can hear what people are really saying, and yes you ARE looking sexier today. You’re sharper now and you will notice more. Keep it up.

Be prepared for some constriction.

This is really, really important:

Expect to fall back — and be incredibly compassionate when the inevitable slip happens. This is the pattern of really big change: Big expansion. Slight constriction. Return to expansion. Micro constriction. Back to expansion — full, fuller, fullest. Expanded.

You’re learning how to do the new you. You’re reacclimatizing to truth and joy and power. You’ll forget for a minute that you’re more powerful than you have ever been. And you’ll dip into an old pattern or habit. You’ll get all jangled and unnerved by the shit you “thought” you just surmounted. That’s cool. You’re on track. You’re re-confirming your expansion. You may be testing yourself. You may even be trying to sabotage yourself. It’s okay, Love. Because you can step back into your new, bigger size WAY more easily than before. Powering up is getting easier. Can you feel it?

Joy can be unsettling. Power can be terrifying. Newness is a mind trip. That’s all you need to know. It’s not that your breakthrough was false, it’s simply that this is… new. Remember how wobbly you were when you learned to ride a bike? Or the first time you drove fast, alone; or swam in the open ocean? This is new, this is new…this is…awe-awe-AWESOME! Stuttering with your new power doesn’t make it any less real. (Also, your new-found power is not afraid of your learning curve. It’s here to stay.)

Document the transformation. Write out your old-to-new ways of being. “I was hiding and silent. I call all of my power back to me. I saw the truth. I spoke the truth. Now I am visible. I feel power in my voice and visibility. I will speak only truth from now on. I’m truly free. Joy is in the freedom. I will keep bringing my joy to the surface.” Write about the revelation. Write about your new way of doing things.

Now declare that you’ve changed. Write a memo. Change a policy. Tell your most trusted friends about your transcendental experience. Talk about how you died and came back — stronger. Articulate what you let go of. Describe the New, True you.

Replay the breakthrough experience. This is key. There was a process that helped you get to the other side. It can be a simple as the eureka moment you had in the pub, talking it through with your mates; or it was the kundalini that shot up your spine in yoga class; or you smoked some peyote on a vision quest; or you cried it out and saw angels in your living room; or you finally fucking launched, or danced hard, or spoke UP. A breakthrough is a breakthrough. Go back to that magic moment when you woke up and recall how the light filled you. And keep calling on that light. 

Keep pulsing open, into your power, WITH your power.

Focus on opening opening opening. Come on…

Don’t let the flash of insight stay just a flash. Tend it like a fire.

Stay with it. Feed your power appreciation and respect. Root DOWN.

Let the newness turn you on. Remember that your bones are full of throbbing marrow. Your cells are constantly renewing (physiologically speaking, you are not the same human you were seven years ago — all of your cells have turned over.) New is HOT.

Just believe me. Go ahead. Lean on my cosmic troops, they are 34-foot mighty angels and they love to show up. I’m telling you: And it’s impossible to turn back after you’ve seen the light. Stare into your own heart and you’ll know what I mean.

Power up,
danielle-signature1        

 

Why jerks show up in your life.

One thing that the self help movement loves to teach and re-teach is that we attract our reality, and specifically, that we attract certain people into our lives to teach us certain things. I’m down with that theory. 100%.

But here’s where the (people) attraction theory gets really dangerous — it’s with these bonus concepts: That we attract certain people because they are, on some level, a reflection of us. OR… (and this is where we really mess ourselves up) that since we attracted a loser into our lives, we must also be… a big loser.

I’ll be extremely poetic about this:

Just because you’ve brought a total jerkface asshole into your reality, it doesn’t mean that they are mirroring your inner jerkface asshole-ness. It might just mean that they’re a total jerk. And you’re not. And the only thing you need to “work on” is how to respond to them.

Want to know why jerks show up in your life? So that you can burn karma — old agreements to be broken in current time, vows to be rescinded, slates to be wiped clean. We attract jerks for contrast — jerks show us what deception and manipulation feels like. They show us how we don’t want to feel — which is excellent intel for knowing how we DO want to feel.

We attract jerks to show us how to love and protect ourselves and the all-wonderful beings in our lives (in which case, the jerkface we have to guard against, usually thinks that we have turned into a big jerk. But that’s to be expected.) We attract jerks because we don’t feel worthy of respect (but that’s okay, you can start requiring respect any time. Immediately would be good.) We attract jerks to find deep compassion, to uncork the curative powers of rage, to prompt the reclamation of sovereignty.

We attract jerks so that we can take back our power and heal.

They’re a jerk. You’re not. It’s just that karmic — and that great of an opportunity.


 

Share with the women you love xo

Tweet it out:

We attract certain people into our lives to teach us certain things.
Knowing how we DON’T want to feel – is excellent intel for knowing how we DO want to feel.

 

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The epidemic of the brittle woman and the salvation of softness

You know her. Maybe you are her. Or you were. Sisters, please don’t become her. Sisters (and brothers), let’s heal her.

She’s giving up on love and life.

Sometime, as a result of having to try too hard to get her very essential Soul needs met she… just… got… worn… down. She had no choice but to stiffen. Then she realized that she had a choice. And she heard Anais Nin say, “And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”

Sometimes she just has no experience of supple because it was never shown to her. Brittleness can come down the female lineage tree like arthritis. But then…

She heard her Spirit say, I miss the softness of you.

The brittle woman belittles her man. And it kills her to kill him like that, but she’s so strapped down by hungry ghosts and frustration — and fear — that she can’t seem to help herself. Until she realizes that not only can she help herself — she can help the whole wide fucking world.

There’r juicy bitches and there’r mean bitches. She’s not the juicy kind.

The brittle woman tells everyone what to do like her life depends on it — but beneath her grip she senses that there are plenty of reasons to trust — that people are beautiful and they’ll come through.

She has a hard time being happy for everyone’s else’s happiness and this keeps her disconnected from free-flowing love — which is what she wants the most — free-flowing love!

She started cutting up her fruit instead of biting it whole. She stopped wearing perfume and celebrating what only women can celebrate. She let the day-to-day become her cause, and she drugged her inner activist with conformity. She stopped circulating her wishes. She forgot. She forgot that:

if she fully admitted to her desire,
if she leaned back on the universe,
if she opened her heart, and her eyes, and then her legs
the power of her truth would come rushing in.

Then she heard Audre Lorde sing: “When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid.”

And she caught herself in the mirror. And she saw possibility. And she heard her Spirit say:

Your openness will move the world.


 

Share with the women you love xo

Tweet it out:

She heard her Spirit say, I miss the softness of you.
Your openness will move the world.

 

Click here to Pin or right click to download + share on Instagram.

Photo credit: Catherine Just

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