So, is this a gift, or a transaction? Because…your entire life is not a business deal.

I have this fabulously kind habit of letting people go in front of me in traffic. I smile and wave to let them slip into the lane. But when they don’t smile or wave back I turn into a pompous primadonna and loudly express some mock gratitude behind the safety of my windshield, THANK YOOOOOU, I say as we accelerate. I finally knocked off that obnoxious habit and now I just say to the non-wavers, psychically, I’m happy to help.

I’ve been thinking a lot about transactional giving these days. I’ll tweet about you if you tweet about me. They owe me a favour. You listen for five minutes to them so they’ll listen when it’s your turn to talk. Even Stevens. Transactional giving can be a beautiful commerce of support, and there’s nothing inherently wrong with that interplay. But if all of our giving is to secure our getting…then, well, it’s gross.

I think we need more gifting. Free kindness. Clean offerings. Zero expectations. Pure Love.

When I manage to gift away some kindness, I feel so much lighter, higher, loverly. I’m not carrying an expectation around with me after the gesture (expectations are such a setup for resentment.) I just wanted you to have what I could give. Because I thought you needed it. And it felt good to give it. And that’s that.

Because my entire life is not a business deal. And you know, I don’t want you to feel obligated to give back to me for any reason. I’m not a big fan of favours, I deeply dislike the whole concept of obligation. I much prefer Pure Love.

I haven’t reached Sainthood status in terms of gifting Pure Love to every human I encounter (I’ll work it into my quarterly objectives, though). I still have my attachments to what I give. I think gratitude is a form of consciousness and acknowledgement lifts up both the giver and the receiver. And I do love a great Thank You note. But I try not keep score anymore. Because my entire life is not a business deal. Because kindness is a renewable resource.

The fewer expectations we carry, the more we have to offer.

 


 

Tell someone that they don’t owe you anything in return. Press forward xo

Tweet it out:

So, is this a gift, or a transaction? Because…your entire life is not a business deal.
The fewer expectations we carry, the more we have to offer. New post up!

 

Click here to Pin or right click to download + share on Instagram.

Photo credit: Catherine Just

avatar
related posts
Energy parasites and addiction to chaos-Danielle-LaPorte

Energy parasites and addiction to chaos…and other things to weed out of your life.

Women and feminine-identified types specialize in beginnings, not endings. We prefer to nurture, not exclude. This of course is spectacular and divine and… challenging. Because destruction is essential to creation. Something has to die for your dream to be born. And by that I mean… you may need to cut off it’s life/lie supply and send it down the river to die.

Danielle-Laporte-I saw a Muslim man-Audio

I saw a Muslim man roll out his prayer carpet…

I saw a Muslim man roll out his prayer carpet in Union Square park
to prostrate to his god.
People, dogs, pigeons, were passing by his intimacy.

Danielle-Laporte-My Very Personal Hurt

My Very Personal Hurt, Suffered, Cried, Tanked, Flopped, Crawled, Begged for Mercy List. May it bring you comfort.

My very personal hurt, suffered, cried, tanked, flopped, crawled, begged for mercy list. May it bring you comfort. Because here’s what I know for SURE: You are never the only one. And there’s always a way through. Always.

Collective-Pain-Danielle-Laporte

Are you feeling the “collective pain”? Here’s how to manage that…

A lot of us are experiencing our own personal pain AND tapping into global, collective pain at the same time. We’re marching, or emphatically not marching. We’re crying in the kitchen, out of the blue. We’re heavy with emotion by noon.

My loves, it’s critical that you let the pain move through you. You have to keep letting it go. And like, there’s no need to worry about being too detached from what’s going on. Because there’s new pain arriving daily. If you’re awake you will hurt. I’m with you…in profound agony over the state of the world. And, my faith and resolve are brighter than my doubt and stronger than my grief. It’s an hourly practice to find that balance.

Danielle-LaPorte-How-to-be-yourself

How to be yourself…when you can’t really be yourself.

“Just be yourself.” Most common self-help sermon ever. I’ve been preaching it for years. Except…being yourself doesn’t always work. Sometimes it’s dangerous. Sometimes it’s not worth the frustration or the futility.

Danielle-LaPorte-Having-Faith-Audio

There is nothing passive about “having Faith.” (And how to deal with doubt).

Faith is the “work” in “Light work”. It scrubs and rinses and steadily erases doubt. Faith stays on doubt’s ass: I see you. I dissolve you. I replace you with Faith. And then doubt will pop up again. And Faith is right there: Yep, I heard you. I choose faith. Yep, I know the odds, I choose Faith. And because Faith knows the natural order of things, she says to doubt: You’ll probably be back later this week. And you might even distract me. But I’ll still choose Faith. No anger, just clarity. No complaints, just pure, fiery resolve.

Danielle-LaPorte-Failures-traced-to-my-silence

All of my failures can be traced to my silence.

Truthing isn’t necessarily easier to do, but it brings incredible ease to your life. And the more you do it, the easier it becomes. The courage, the classy delivery, the compassionate humour, it all becomes more accessible when you’re using your voice everyday.

Will you do as much as it takes, as long as it takes? 2017 is asking

Will you do as much as it takes, as long as it takes? 2017 is asking.

Listen. It’s time. This is it. 2017. New. Year. Now. I for one am going deeper and higher. I’m reaching inward for my strength, facing my Soul, and I’m going to pour my devotion to the Light all over every word I speak, and every human I encounter and adore and hold, and every cause I’m working for.

danielle-laporte-how-to-wish-someone-well-audio

How to wish someone well — in a way that will blow your life wide open.

We’ve all been hurt. Screwed over. Taken for granted. Unseen. And once we untangle our hearts and egos from those painful interactions, sometimes we can still manage to send someone positive vibes.Harm done, but okay. Everyone did their best. Onward. I wish them well. And even though you’d never commune or collaborate with that person ever again, you really mean it…

Danielle-LaPorte-Year-in-review

5 Q’s for your deeper Year In Review

Do your year in review with a friend. Last year I sat in a pub in Ojai, while Steph pushed me to do a rapid-fire reflection on the closing year. Keep reading…

Pin It on Pinterest

Share This