how have you changed?

Danielle LaPorte. Grade 1. Haircut by dad.

Danielle LaPorte. Grade 1. Haircut by dad.

“People change all the time and forget to tell each other.”
Lillian Gershwin

If you doubt that change happens, dig me in 1976 {see picture above} Change is a marvelous thing to celebrate. Acknowledging growth helps us to keep on growing. Taking stock of the leagues you’ve traveled is especially useful for those of us who drive ourselves so hard to be…whatever we’re craving to be.

: I used to have glasses. And then I had lazer eye surgery.

: I used to believe in soul mates, in “The One.” And then I learned that “The One” is “The One” because you say he is.

: I used to be angry and didn’t know why. Now I’m righteous but happy.

: In my twenties I WILLED it to happen. Now I allow it to happen.

: I used to need ritual. Now I just want the peace that lies beyond structure, even ritual.

: I no longer care if you don’t agree with me. My heart is softer. I have room for more opinions than my own.

: I used to think I had to earn my keep, sing for my supper. Now I follow my bliss and the feast finds me.

: I used to ’round up’, adding a little glow to the story here ‘n there. Now I relish the weightless cleanliness of precise and plain communication – which can still be done poetically.

And the list goes on…evolution is always spiraling outward, upward, seeking it’s own creative edge. Ducklings turn into swans. Feminists turn into humanists. Hearts heal. The narrow expands. There’s much to celebrate.

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How you listen is how you live. (A poem for being of service.)

You may hear this as an order, an invitation, or as the opportunity of lifetimes.

How you listen is how you live.
Can you hear the women crying?
Can you hear the soil gasping for clean air?
And did you hear that? That’s the sound of a good man asking, How can I serve?

How do you serve?

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So, is this a gift, or a transaction? Because…your entire life is not a business deal.

I’ve been thinking a lot about transactional giving these days. I’ll tweet about you if you tweet about me. They owe me a favour. You listen for five minutes to them so they’ll listen when it’s your turn to talk. Even Stevens. Transactional giving can be a beautiful commerce of support, and there’s nothing inherently wrong with that interplay. But if all of our giving is to secure our getting…then, well, it’s gross.

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Love the egg you’re in. (This is not a sermon on patience. But…)

Savour the simplicity of your pre-dreams-come-true time. Love the egg you’re in. Because not too long from now–and right on time, you’ll be spreading your wings and life will never be the same again.

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Rock your emptiness

But what if we rocked our emptiness? Felt the perimeter of ourselves. Relished the silence. Made friends with the peace that’s always waiting for us. What if we got off on the discomfort of our emptiness and let it be creative tension?

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What’s underneath wishful thinking?

Wishful thinking is tangled up with craving. We want what we want. So we ignore the evidence that we’re very likely not going to get what we want out of a situation. Craving… wishing. Craving… denial. Craving… tolerating. It’s a wishous cycle.

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Don’t worry about being invited back. My Manifesto for Creativity.

Meaningfulness. Reveal myself. Be compassionate. Don’t worry about being invited back. Go there. xo. I jotted this down when I began writing my book. I wanted a manifesto and it had to happen quickly because…I had a book to write.

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Life is what happens on the way to the finish line.

If you’re not loving what it feels like between your various life destinations, then get off the ride. Burn the itinerary. Fuck “motivation” and be still long enough to find your inspiration.

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Let the Love in. Because, “It’s an honour to help you.”

I was in a spiritual tizzy — that’s an esoteric term for 80% emotions-running-wild, and 20% having faith that everything will work out. I can’t remember what it was over (probably divorce papers, or a publishing contract, or buying a house. But it involved documents and beaucoup emotion.)

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What to do after you have a breakthrough. (You’re going to shrink after you expand, so, listen closely.)

Threshold, crossed. You got there. After the grinding, the repetitive strain, the cord-cutting, the screams of release, the bliss of relief — the training paid off. Muscle burn got you across the finish line. Soul fire resurrected you. BREAKTHROUGH.

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Why jerks show up in your life.

We attract jerks to burn karma — old agreements to be broken in current time, vows to be rescinded, slates to be wiped clean. We attract jerks for contrast — jerks show us what deception and manipulation feels like. They show us how we DON’T want to feel — which is excellent intel for knowing how we DO want to feel.

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