what is your relationship to…life?

I’m not sure there is a bigger question than this. It bears repeating:
what…is…your relationship to life?

I was in Kauai in the fall and read Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth between beaches. And this question of his became my walking, rambling, meditation. “What is my relationship…to LIFE?!” Daunting. Spectacular. Galvanizing. Perhaps my favourite question of all time.

It opened the floodgates of inquiry for me. I spiraled it backwards to look at my relationship to my man, my child, my families of blood and soul … my portals of connectivity and on good days, communion. What was the majority experience of me showing up in the world? How is it that I am vulnerable? What feels pure and steadfast within my cells?

One question led to another. What do I bring forth from the well of my essential self, and what do I keep in reserve, locked, frightened, greedy, proud, and practical? When I engage with people what is my motive? How do I greet strangers and friends with whom I have history?

What is my most regular waking thought?

What is my favourite feeling? Who am I trying to impress? How do I stand in crisis? Where does my generosity stop? What gets to the core of my core?

I actually didn’t need to delve into the deep recesses of my psyche. It turned out to be a remarkably basic exercise – one that I bet you could find your own answer to by the end of today. It all got down to this simple sub-plot question:

How am I with people?

I saw the pattern of truth emerge, a through-line to ALL of my interactions with people … with everyone, every one. Whether it is my lover-companion of ten years with whom I can be amazing or pathetic, or it’s the dude sliding my tea across the counter, there is a consistent energy and attitude that I bring to them. I can see the rhythm of it in my mind. It goes like this: I give off a honey-golden love warmth, an “I love you, we’re in this together” declaration. It’s pure and it’s innocent and is graciously global.

Then out comes this acuity, a kind of “I get you, I see you, and I’m very serious about it.” I’m not sure if it’s a natural intensity or if it’s a protective reaction that roots in fear, but often, my next level of vibe is either something along the subtle lines of “don’t fuck with me,” or “you do your thing, I’ll do mine, and all is well.”

When I looked at my relationship to the humans (and my dog counts as a human,) that I relate to, it became clear that I am a planet of love with a hair-trigger drawbridge that closes without much warning. I am, and this was somewhat heartbreaking for me to realize…I am somewhat reserved with my love.

And thus, my relationship to life is: Big Love. True Smile. Tricky Lock.

It’s a long term relationship. My vows are a work in progress.

related posts
Loving yourself Danielle LaPorte

Loving yourself…when you hate yourself.

If “love” is confusing, then “SELF-love” can be mystifying. So I’m pressing pause on the self-love conversation to insert the word compassion… The feel of “compassion” is more direct and melting for most of us. So let’s start there. Because…

Courageous Minority-1

The Courageous Minority vs. the road to mediocrity (which is always really…safe.)

The Courageous Minority vs. the road to mediocrity (which is always really…safe.) Safe. The road to mediocre is always really…safe. And in terms of fulfillment, “safe” is really, really dangerous.

Danielle-LaPorte-It-only-gets-more-painful

It only gets more painful. But it’s good news.

It only gets more painful. But it’s good news. I thought that the ability to feel more deeply would give me access to solace, that special area reserved for The Feelers. But as it turns out, I just get more adept at crying and then carrying on.

ARE YOU READY TO FORGIVE? The complicated, gritty path to grace.

ARE YOU READY TO FORGIVE? The complicated, gritty path to grace. It’s complex. It’s confusing. It’s deeply particular. It’s the through-line of most mystical teachings: Forgiveness.

Deep-Positivity

Why positive thinking might be leading us in the wrong direction.

Deep positivity.
If there could be a slogan for manifestation theory, this would be it:
Energy follows thought. Energy follows thought. Energy follows thought. And by the way…energy follows thought.
Manifestation happens from the mind.
For it to work effectively, you must achieve clarity of desire, root into the depths of positivity, fend off doubts with Faith, and repeat. Every minute of every day, give or take.

Mixing-our-own-medicine

Antidepressants, meditation, the Goddess, and antibiotics. Making up your healing path.

Antidepressants, meditation, the Goddess, and antibiotics. Making up your healing path. There’s a time and place for everything. Knowing the right time and the right place is how you become your own healer.

WhiteHotTruthChapter3

How to be truly wise? Rock your paradoxes.

True wisdom usually holds and transcends opposing points of view. Wisdom knows that there is always an exception to the rule, that there is a time and place, and that a case-by-case approach is divine protocol.

When “sacred” sex goes south. Freeing our bodies…messing with our minds.

Groupthink is difficult to detect in the self-help space because it’s often spun as progressive and undogmatic. It shimmers with a counter-culture glow.

Danielle-LaPorte-The-Lie-Of-Affiliation

THE LIE OF AFFILIATION. Or…why group-think can really suck.

THE LIE OF AFFILIATION. The Lie of Affiliation says, “Groupthink is good think.” We could also call this The Lie of Being Cool. Join me for lunch on Facebook Live tomorrow [12pm PST/ 3pm EST] and we’ll bite into the dynamics of group-think (it can really suck) and I’ll do Q&A!

White-Hot-Truth

I want you to love and trust yourself more intensely.

So White Hot Truth is about questioning our quest. Not so that we can get all debaucherous (tho’ that might be exactly what your spiritual evolution requires at the moment. In which case, go for it.) so we can craft a spirituality for ourselves that feels inspired and liberating — instead of a checklist for getting holistic and moral approval ratings.

Pin It on Pinterest

Share This